The Ultimate Conundrum

There are two wolves that live inside every person. One wolf wants everyone to think that they are a cool, tough badass who fears nothing and chews rocks for breakfast. The other wolf loves rosé. But how can these two primal forces coexist? How will people believe that you are a self sufficient girl boss, or a sigma prowler on a single minded mission of self advancement if you’re out at a wine bar every weekend with a light and fruity glass of rosé?

Option 1: Deny

If someone comes up to you and asks why you’re drinking rosé, pretend like you are drinking something else. Rosé? No way. You’re drinking whiskey, or moonshine, or something badasses drink. It just looks like rosé because of the light. If you act sufficiently badass, this should intimidate them into silence and you can enjoy your rosé in peace.

Option 2: Deflect

If you don’t think you’ll be able to bluff that hard, theres another option. This isn’t your rosé. You’re just holding it for a friend. They are in the bathroom, and as their coolest most badass friend they trust you to hold their drink. If you employ this option, you run the risk of the person interrogating you sticking around to see if your ‘friend’ is real.

Option 3: Embrace

There’s only one option that can truly ensure that you won’t look like a fool in this wine bar when someone asks you what you’re drinking. Tell the truth! You may think that this will cause your cool and collected image to shatter, but the truth is that rosé is badass. Tell that to yourself. Absorb it. If you believe that rosé is badass, then so will the world around you. The two wolves within you do not need to be fighting. Make peace with yourself.

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