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A Partisan’s Guide to Oktoberfest Wine

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Autumn is well on its way, which means that every wine enjoyer’s nightmare is on the horizon: Oktoberfest, when beer drinking is ascendant and every good and honest wine aficionado must hide in their homes for fear of violent reprisal by the beer drunk mobs that roam the streets. Some of you may be asking yourselves: What is he talking about? Does anyone really care that much about this? Why do we have to be this tribal about alcohol preference? In response I say, if you are not with us, you are against us. For loyal, ride-or-die wine enjoyers, here is my definitive list of the best Oktoberfest wines.

Sparking Wine- The Stealthy Choice

While it may leave you with more wine than you know what to do with, a wine drinker may remain inconspicuous at Oktoberfest festivities by filling a beer stein up with a sparking white wine such as Champagne or Prosecco. The beer-drinking oafs around you will be unable to tell the difference between the delicious wine and their own putrid lagers, and will let you roam freely to enjoy delicious Germanic foods such as pretzels and sausages. Just be sure not to drink too much- theres a reason wine is general served in smaller glasses than beer!

Riesling- the Connoisseur’s Oktoberfest Wine

While it may be harder to disguise than a sparkling wine, a German Riesling pairs excellently with Oktoberfest Cuisine– and if the goal of this mission is to enjoy Oktoberfest without drinking any beer, it may pay to employ the best food pairing possible. Wash down your bratwurst and sauerkraut with light, sweet Riesling, but be aware that if any of the beer drinkers around you find out what you’re drinking, you will be in terrible danger.

Pinot Noir- The Statement Maker’s Wine

While white wines might sneak under the noses of the beer drinking horde, a red will almost certainly be sniffed out. That’s why Pinot Noir is a great Oktoberfest wine for those among us who refuse to compromise our beliefs. The instant you walk into Oktoberfest with your glass of Pinot Noir, you become public enemy number one- but its a decent pairing with German cuisine, and who knows- maybe the beer drinkers will be so impressed with your boldness that they will leave you be.

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